Fluffy Friday: ONEderland


If you are a Biggest Loser fan you’ll know what I’m talking about. (It could very well be from other places too, but that is where I know it from.) It means that my weight finally starts with a ONE.

199.8 <– This is the number I've seen the past two mornings!

I'M UNDER 200lbs!!! WOOT!!

I needed this. I really needed to hit this milestone after struggling so much to get back on track. It reenforces that what I am doing is working. Even though it is slow going and a lot of the time I just don't want to. IT'S WORKING. And it will continue to work as long as I stick with it. There isn't any secret to weight loss. It's about eating well (and the right amount) and working out. Calories in vs. calories out. Figuring out what YOUR ratio is, is the difficult part. Making sustainable life changes is the only way to keep the weight off, and that isn't easy especially with the way our culture has become, but I know it's the only way I'm not going to end up back here.

I'm so happy to be checking that goal off my list. It's been a great week. I've been tracking my food and staying within my calorie limit. In my effort to get back on track with my weight loss I've been making sure that I workout no less than every-other day. I'd love to say that I'm going to workout an hour a day 6 days a week, but I know myself better than that. Setting a schedule I know I can stick to and remain consistent with is far more effective than getting discouraged and quitting by setting unrealistic goals and failing to meet them.

This week: -3.2 lbs (!)

Total loss -14.2 lbs

Matt is refusing to get on the scale at this point so I don't have any numbers for him. He is still where I was a couple of weeks ago. He is trying to get back at it and start being diligent about it again but he might need a few "encouraging" words. ūüėČ


Fluffy Friday: Sunday’s BS excuse edition

I didn’t bail on this weeks check in. Entirely, that is. I’ve been meaning to write since Friday but other things have just been taking priority. I was really hoping that last week’s post was going to help get me back on track. It didn’t. But the scale finally did on Friday morning.

After gaining, yet again, I started asking myself why in the hell was I doing this to myself AGAIN?? Why was I letting one effing stomach bug knock me off track this far? Why can’t I find that drive and determination that I had when I started this???

My only real answer is a bull shit one. It’s a bull shit excuse.

I don’t feel like it.

I don’t feel like caring about it. I don’t want to weigh my food, it’s easier to just eat it. I don’t want to think about it all. I don’t want to workout when I could be doing _______. I just don’t want to.

Guess what not “feeling like it” gets me? Fat.

The scale needs to be going down. I’m not happy with my body at this size. It’s not healthy. I’m setting a poor example for my kids. There are endless reasons to list as to why I MUST lose this weight. There are no reasons for me to stay here. Only excuses. Being lazy and not wanting too, are awful excuses to stop trying.

So after a nice little chat with myself that consisted of a lot of creative curse words and mental head smacking, I got my ass in gear working out and started tracking everything I ate. Again. I’m at day 3 and still going strong. There have been several moments of, “Oh, do I have too?!?!?!” Which is when my inner skinny bitch trainer starts screaming at me.

I finally feel like I’m back on track after like a month(?!) of wandering somewhere nearby the realm of caring and I’m really hoping that I’ll have a weight loss to share with you on Friday.

As of this morning I was down a total of 11 lbs from the start of this back in… March… I believe… Sure, we’ll go with that. Which puts me up by 0.4 from last week. It’s not a big amount but that is also down about 2 lbs from an earlier weigh-in this week. It’s those little bits that can add up fast if you don’t track your weight. I know that some people can just tell by their clothes if they are gaining weight but I must not have the right kind of clothes or something. I can gain like 15-20 lbs before I would need to go up a size. ¬†(effing stretch jeans & yoga pants)

I’d love to hear some success stories and motivational tips if anyone has any because although I feel more on track than I have in a LONG time, the first couple of weeks are hard!

Fluffy Friday

Before I get to the (good) fluffy news, there are a few things I need to note.

Now, I’ve had a bunch of blog ideas floating in my head for a couple of weeks now, but getting them out has been quite an issue. Motivation to do much of anything has been gone. Mostly because of this…snow

Yep. It is April 19th and we have gotten over a foot of effing snow in the past 48 hours, and that doesn’t include the 6ish inches we got at the start of the week! I’ve got such a horrid case of cabin fever I don’t even know what to do with myself. We all desperately want to be outside but it just keeps SNOWING!!! There is also this BIG EVENT coming up in 22 days that is supposed to take place outside…. I know that everything will workout perfectly, even if there is still snow on the ground but COME ON! MOTHER NATURE PLEASE CUT US A BREAK!

Also? Charlotte turns one(!!!!) on Tuesday. We are having her party on Sunday and I’m just in a daze with how fast time has gone. I’ll have a ton of pictures to post of the party and her 1 year shoot next week so I will¬†apologize¬†now for the photo storm that is coming. My plans of an outdoor shoot have been shot to shit though. Grrrr.

On to the good news! We lost weight this week! On Monday I re-programmed my calorie counter after reading post after post of stories that¬†I could have written myself about their stalling weight loss. We all feel we are doing exactly what we should be doing but nothing is happening, or even worse gaining weight. There really is nothing more frustrating than being 100% dedicated and driven, doing everything that you think you should be doing but then still gaining weight. The problem we all shared is that we were not eating enough. I know, I know, I know! I’m a broken record. I keep talking about this week after week but this time I was diligent about actually eating all of my calories (within 100+/-).

I was determined to do it full out this week even if it meant that I gained 5 lbs because I was eating too much. The only way to find out if my¬†suspicions¬†were right was to¬†accurately¬†test it. Even though it felt like the opposite of what I should be doing, I stuck with it.¬†It might sound¬†ridiculous¬†but it hasn’t been easy to eat more. I’m going against everything I’ve ever been told about losing weight. Going against every perception I have about weight loss. “Everyone” says to eat less & workout more. Easy right? Not so much. At least not for me. I’m still working on finding that input/output sweet spot for my body but I’m still trying and I’m making progress! That is a huge¬†achievement, and I have to keep reminding myself of that.

I have never kept with it like this before. I have always given up by now. This time feels so different then every other time before when I have tried to make these changes, it is hard to explain. I don’t know if it is because Matthew is doing it with me and having that support is so amazing and has made a world of difference for sure. But I also feel that knowing we are done (snip, snip) having babies has really changed my entire mindset. The “I’m going to get pregnant and I’ll have to start all over, again.”¬†isn’t there anymore nagging at me. This is the body that I’m going to have for the rest of my life and another baby isn’t going to push me back to the starting line. After a collective 8 months of trying to get pregnant, 18ish months of being pregnant, and 21 months of breastfeeding, I finally(!) get to have total control over my body.¬†

Now for next week, my goal (the 1st of my short-term goals) is to make it back to ONEderland! (2.8 to go!) That is a place that I haven’t been to in a very, very, VERY long time.

This weeks weigh-in


  • This week -1.6 lbs
  • Total -11.4 lbs


  • This week -1.6 lbs
  • Total -12 lbs